Vows for Sale, here’s a laugh for you!!!

Good morning,

Good afternoon,

Or Good evening,

Whatever part of the world you live in, if you know English you will enjoy a good laugh anytime, and I have some good jokes coming up to you in this post but first !!! This post is part of the Humor therapy month I already started on my facebook page if you haven’t read my previous post on this subject I advice that you do, you’ll find some funny but extremely educative materials in it, then will you be a sweetheart and spare five minutes to check the facebook page out ? have a few laughs, share the jokes and help spread smiles and joy around? Here’s the link again:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Rana-Armoush/266311370081448

enjoy it!

! During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer:

“Look, I’ll give you $100 if you’ll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I’m supposed to promise to ‘love, honor and obey’ and ‘be faithful to her forever,’ I’d appreciate it if you’d just leave that out.”

He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied.

On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the groom’s vows, the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said: “Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?”

The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, “Yes,” then leaned toward the pastor and hissed: “I thought we had a deal.”

The pastor put a $100 bill into the groom’s hand and whispered: “She made me a better offer.”

funny wedding

funny wedding

 Spaghetti A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for a few years. One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant.

Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to have the child. If she stayed in Italy,
he would also provide child support until the child turned 18.

She agreed, but wondered how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it discrete, he told her to mail him a post card, and write “Spaghetti” on the back. He would then arrange for child support.

One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.

“Honey,” she said, “you received a very strange post card today.”

“Oh, just give it to me and I’ll explain it later,” he said.

The wife obeyed, and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.

On the card was written “Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without.”

husband and wife in bed funny cartoon photo

husband and wife in bed funny cartoon photo

I announce it a humor month!Laugh your sickness away!!!!

A good laugh heals a lot of hurts. — Madeleine L’Engle

The following questions from lawyers were taken from official court records nationwide:

1.Now, doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn’t know anything about it until the next morning?

2. Q: What happened then?
A: He told me, he says, “I have to kill you because you can identify me.”
Q: Did he kill you?

3. Q: Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

Laugh

Laugh

4.Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there girls?

Joke

Joke

You have probably heard about the laughter or humor therapy. This term has been introduced to the wide media audience through the past ten years, and after a lot or research and studies.

joke

joke

.

If you are wondering how humor and laughter can help cure your pain and illness or at least ease them, here’s an idea:

Chris Woolston, M.S. wrote uPagesnder the title of ”  Humor Therapy“:

“…..Researchers found that people who watched a funny 60-minute video experienced a significant drop in so-called stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline. Scientists say these hormones can contribute to a wide range of stress-related illnesses including depression and heart disease…”

“… Humor may also ease pain…The researchers also found that people with heart disease were 40 percent less likely to laugh in a variety of situations compared to people of the same age without heart disease.”

You can read more about this issue on : http://consumer.healthday.com/encyclopedia/article.asp?AID=647533

So as you have probably concluded it’s time to erase  that frown off your face, and start wearing a smile instead! Laugh people laugh! Laugh about life, about your problems, about work… and if you can’t do it, then apply this old but very affective proverb: Fake it until you make it 🙂

cute-angry girl

cute-angry girl

Laugh to save your life, cure your heart, ease your pain and cure your depression! And laughter is contagious, that’s why they say laugh and the world will laugh with you!!!

laugh-joke

laugh-joke

Try the following exercise:  after dinner tonight, when the whole family is gathering in the living room, watching T.V. Start laughing, for no reason at all! Laugh out loud , fake it and laugh. Sure they’re going to ask you what’s wrong with you, and why you’re laughing. Ignore the questions and keep laughing, a few minutes later the whole family will be laughing. No one will know why but they’ll sure enjoy it and the evening will be much more pleasant!!!

Mr Bean- Monalisa

Mr Bean- Monalisa

[Humanity] has unquestionably one really effective weapon—laughter. Power, money, persuasion, supplication, persecution—these can lift at a colossal humbug—push it a little—weaken it a little, century by century; but only laughter can blow it to rags and atoms at a blast. Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand. — Mark Twain

So I’m announcing a whole month of laughter on my facebook page, I will be posting jokes, funny quotes, funny pictures, cartoons , briefly anything that will draw a smile on your face. I will be laughing and waiting for all of you cute readers to laugh with me. Make this month a month of humor therapy in your life as well, join me , post your jokes, share other people jokes and help make the world a better and more happy place.

Here’s the link to facebook page:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Rana-Armoush/266311370081448

I hope to see a lot of you participating in this ” Humor Therapy Month, Help earth Laugh”

Last but not least: have a laugh… Hhahahahahah

Social Security A retired gentleman went to the social security office to apply for Social Security.

The woman behind the counter asked him for his driver’s license to verify his age. He looked in his pockets and realized he had left his wallet at home. He told the woman that he was very sorry but he seemed to have left his wallet at home. “I will have to go home and come back later.” The woman says, “Unbutton your shirt.” So he opens his shirt revealing curly silver hair. She says, “That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me” and she processed his Social Security application.

When he gets home, the man excitedly tells his wife about his experience at the social security office. She says, “You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability too.”

jokes

jokes

Thank you Aisha of Aisha’s Scrapyard!!!

My talented and mysterious ( I already have the chills) Fellow blogger Aisha of Aisha’s Scrapyard posted on 17/03/2012 a blog titled: Some of my favorite bloggers on WordPress.http://ashscrapyard.wordpress.com/2012/03/17/some-of-my-favorite-bloggers-on-wordpress/

Aisha chose five of her favorite bloggers to talk about and dedicate this post to. I was happily surprised to see the name of my blog in her post , not only that but she also listed me as her second favorite!!!  Oh my God, I’m as excited as little child!!!!!

Check out what she wrote about my blog!

2. Rana Armoush

Tag Line : Passionate For Words.

She always fills me with good warm feelings through her blogs. Sometimes her blogs are simple 3 lines with a wonderful deep message and sometimes it just a story about a day of her life. But whatever that she writes, her words are genuine, passionate and worth.

There are messages for us to make us a better person for this life, hereafter, for others and for God.

Her freeverse poems are a roller coaster of emotions and feelings.

Isn’t this introduction bone chilling or what?!!!!

I’m so sorry dear Aisha for being late to thank you properly for your amazing encouragement and wonderful words! After I’ve read this a weird feeling of self-confidence filled my soul, so thank you again for all the positive energy you sent towards me through your post.

People Aisha’s Scrapyardis a must visit, go a head click the link and enter a world like no other! When I said she was mysterious I wasn’t exaggerating, she’s wonderfully mysterious! I always find something new in a weird but amazing way in her posts. Here are some of my favorite:

.I Finally Meet My Stalker Ghost For The First Time… For Real

.My Very First OFFICIAL & COMPLETE Experience Of A Lucid Dream…

.Women Are All SuperWomen Inside… Dare To Switch Roles?

Once More thank you Aisha!

 

 

 

The sunshine blogger award and the Genuine Blogger Award.

It’s really time to address this and write down a descent thank you post to my fellow blogger and oversea friend Rasha from Leanova designs.

So, a Big thank you Rasha for nominating me for two amazing awards, the Sunshine award and the Genuine Blogger Award. Your nomination means a lot to me.

BTW If you haven’t dropped by Leanova designs , I advice that you do. What ever your taste is, you’re going to find something that you like in this designer’s blog. Here are some of my favorite posts from her blog:

Dog names for Graphic Designers

My Bubbles

Smoke Art

As for the nominations please check out

Thank you once more Rasha.

An Amazing Father!

 

To all the Father’s out there, Happy Father’s day!
To all the hard working, loving, caring and providing men in our lives, thank you!
To all the women striving to fill their absent men shoes, happy father’s day! You deserve it to!
But my words today are dedicated to a wonderful man, a father I’ve witnessed coming to life.
To a wonderful Father,
To you my husband,

Baby,
Let me tell about your daddy,
Listen carefully as I brush your hair…
He’s the most amazing man I’ve ever met
For the bitter and the sweet, he has always been there!
The moment you were conceived my girl
You were made from a mixture of love and care
Every step of the way your daddy loved us
He waited for your arrival impatiently, I swear
And finally you were here, after your difficult flight
He held your tiny body and kissed your little hands
With all the tenderness he could share
He was there for your first diaper change
For your first milk bottle and for your first bath
For your first smile, giggle, and when you sat on that little chair
Your father my child
Is the most amazing Man,
When you grow up,
And they ask you for your full name
Be proud to wear these letters
The few letters of his name
Be proud to say that you’ve been brought up
By a father who truly cares.
And because I love you
I honestly pray
That one day, you’ll meet a man who has your father’s traits
Only then I’ll be sure you’re going to be happy
With a love that lasts forever something much more than the usual human affair.

A Letter to My Baby Girl!

Dear Anna,

This is the first letter I write to you after your birth, and I’m very excited to tell you all the news that’s been happening in our lives lately. First let me start by telling you how much I’ve grown in love with you in these past eight months! From the moment I kissed your little hand in the hospital until this moment as you sit on the carpet playing with your toys and biting anything you could get your hands on! And I promise to keep loving you until the day I close my eyes and fall into my eternal sleep.

Baby girl, day by day, you’re teaching me how to be a mother, and a better human being. You’re eight months and two weeks old already, and every second of these eight months was an adventure. But there are certain moments that keep spinning through my mind every time I talk about you, I call these moments the peek memories. The first time I laid eyes on you when the doctor held you up after your delivery, and you were so blue and crying out so loud that your voice filled the operation room! That moment I was praying and crying and laughing at the same time!!! I was lost in that moment and all I wanted was to cuddle you and kiss you!

My second peek memory, was when we had a visit from some relatives who you’ve not seen before! When one of them tried to hold you up, you started crying and looked at me scared, and you tried to jump from the Lady‘s arms to mine!! I took you into my arms and for the first time I felt like a real mother, you were asking me to protect you  and I was there for you, and forever I ‘ll be there for you.

My third peek moment was the day you rolled over!! I was getting worried that you’re late to roll over and already seven months old! And one morning out of no where you rolled over! Me and your dad we were so excited, we were gazing at you not believing what just happened! And now you can’t stop rolling over and scooting yourself all over the house! I even caught you trying to pull over some of my decorative items! You’re so cute!

Here comes my Fourth and by so far my best peek moment! Your first tooth!!!! I’m super excited to tell you about this Anna, so last week you were biting on your plastic toy and suddenly you started screaming! Me and your dad rushed to pick you up, I thought you must have hurt your gum so I grabbed the teething gel and started rubbing your little swallow gum! I told your father : The poor thing must have heart herself hard, I can feel the cut beneath my finger! Thank God your father is the smart one in this family, LOL! He opened your mouth and saw your little tooth peeking out!

My poor baby, you have been really fuzzy through these few days. As another tooth peaked just right next to the other. And we haven’t been getting enough sleep. But I know it’s just a phase, another growth spurt that we’re experimenting together, and soon all the pain will go away and you’ll feel a lot better about those weird white things that appeared in your mouth all of a sudden!

OOOps  I forget to tell you about the day you first said Mama!!! But I wrote you a whole poem about that moment!

Anna, Me and your dad, we love you so much. Everything we do, every decision we take , we now do it with your best interest in mind. You’re the joy of our lives and the blessing in our house. And everyday we pray for God to give you a long healthy and happy life, and to give us the power to be there for you every step of the way and the good health to support you and watch you grow!

Until my second letter, stay as cute as you are, love you!

Mama

And you said ” Ma..ma”!!!

smile my baby girl,

your smile is magical, it cures mama’s heart

smile my baby girl,

giggle, laugh and play…

bringing life to my life, you seem to master this art

there’s no joy greater than the one I’m feeling today

your little lips imitating my morning song,

my little random babbling parrot,

your little lips my baby, managed to come together

and say the word I’ve been dreaming to hear for so long

” Ma…Maaa” you said it so innocently,

and you made my heart dance with your little smile of victory

staring deep inside your grey eyes, makes feel so strong

hearing you say ” Mama” was better than I ever thought it would be

a little tear tinkled my eyes as I held you and danced

but I refused to let it out, you’ll never see your mama cry

maybe on your graduation party, as you celebrate your degree

or on your wedding day, I might shed a tear ( or cry for nights after you leave)

As I stand with you , doing your veil, feeling so proud of the most beautiful girl…

Oh my god, I’ve gotten so carried away

my future just flashed in colors, and I saw you in years to come

all because of one little word

you cured mama’s heart

you little lovely being ,you seem to master this art:)

 

 

Her Identity says : MOM, nothing more!!!

Her Identity says : MOM, nothing more!!!.

Her hair is a mess, dressed in her pijamas still,

A mop in her hand cleaning the spilled milk cup, which lies on the kitchen floor

trying to to have time not to burn the eggs on the stove

running from room to room to get them dressed, wondering whether she was living a dream!

four little children making the biggest mess

school bus is almost there, and nothing as always is ready yet

No time to think about her sours , to time for herself!

She breathes in deep trying to control her rebellious nerves

she breathes out with a prayer: God give me the strength!

a few minutes later and they are on their way to school

the house suddenly empty! and the sound of silence gives her the chills

My mother drinks her cup of coffee and stares deep inside her soul

her identity is not clear to her anymore,

she only knows she’s a mother of four,

she thinks as she rests her aching feet,

she even forgets to answer to her name when she’s called

She’s used to being called: mom, and nothing more!

STOP!!!! 5 minutes already gone!!

I found out that my fellow blogger Colline has written a post for a weekly challenge, hosted by another fellow blogger, I like her post and the idea so much that I decided to participate!!!

(This post is written for the Five Minute Friday Challenge hosted by The Gypsy Mama. The main idea is for Participants to write for 5 minutes with no editing, no over thinking, and no looking back. This week’s Challenge is about: Identity)